Friday, January 30, 2009

Pregnant for Free/Grandma Mary's Visit

Grandma Mary came to rescue us! Thank goodness.....our lives feel like they have been turned upside down! Let me tell you why we are in such a predicament....
When Emma was about 15 months old, Dan and I decided that it was time for us to have another child. We both wanted our kids to be around 2 years apart. Although I wasn't quite ready for another baby, I felt like it was right. When a whole year had passed with no success, I really didn't mind, but when the second year passed without getting pregnant I started to think something was wrong. I went to my regular OB appointment and he ordered some tests for both Dan and I. When the tests came back normal, we were relieved but still a bit worried. 2 years seemed like ample time to "give it" as everyone kept saying. Why wasn't I getting pregnant? Something had to be going on, after all we didn't have ANY problem with Emma. My doctor didn't seem to think it was that big of a deal, so I bypassed him and went straight to an infertility specialist. After another round of intensive testing for both of us, the results were still the same. We were diagnosed with UNEXPLAINED INFERTILITY. I am glad that nothing was wrong, but at the same time I wish they would have found something. At least then, we would know what to do to fix it. Since we didn't have any answers, my Dr. recommended starting with some mild forms of IVF (invitro fertilization) therapy and if those didn't work we would try some more invasive procedures. We were scared, at least I was, but decided this would be the best thing for us. I started with Clomid then IUI (google it), egg harvesting with regular IVF and finally IVF with ICSI (another google). I had 14 eggs retrieved with 9 of them being fertilized into embryos. We did 2 rounds of IVF with ICSI in Jan and then again in March 2008. I had 3 embryos transferred each time. Still no success. I couldn't believe after all that NOTHING worked!!! The whole process was so physically and emotionally draining for me. The daily shots and hormones turned me into another person. Someone I didn't even know existed. I am sorry to anyone I was mean to...it really wasn't my fault-I blame the meds completely!!! After I was done being mad at everyone and everything, we decided to wait until Dec 2008 to do anything else. We still had 3 more embryos frozen and waiting for us.
So.....while we were waiting for December to arrive, I found out I was pregnant! You know what they say about "not thinking" about something? Well it had actually worked for me! But our excitement was short lived because about 2 weeks later I had a miscarriage. I was devastated. I was so glad that we hadn't told anyone yet. Well....December was only a few weeks away, so I kept on with my life trying the best I could to not let anyone know how bad I was hurting. A few weeks later, I had to go in for a blood test to get ready for the embryo transfers. The nurse called me a few days after to say she had good news. I thought she was going to say that everything was normal and I could have Dan start giving me the shots. But to my EXTREME surprise, she told me I was pregnant again. I almost fell over! 2 months in a row I had gotten pregnant without anyones help but Dan's???? WOW!!! This time I was much more reserved with my excitement though. I didn't want to get emotionally attached this soon. We didn't tell a soul. It was a hard secret to keep. When I was 6 weeks along I went in for another blood test to measure my levels. The results came back SUPER high. Normal is around 100, but mine were 130,000! The nurse assured me that this was a VERY good sign and that I should tell everyone our good news, which we did. We were so excited!! We went in for an ultrasound the next week and saw and heard the baby's heart beat. It was amazing. I had forgotten how awesome it feels to hear that tiny little thing! Emma is already starting to be a big sister and talking about how much fun it is going to be and how mom and dad won't have to do anything because she will take care of the baby ALL the time. She even prays for it to live when she says her personal prayers which totally melts my heart. I guess the unsuccessful IVFs last year affected her more than we thought.
So why did my mom have to come out and "rescue" us??? Because I am the sickest I have ever been in my entire life! This is not just morning sickness! I have horrible pain in my upper abdomen that is so bad I can't breathe. I have been lying on the couch or in my bed for the past 4 weeks. Emma is sick with bronchitis and the antibiotics she is taking are giving her diarrhea. I called my mom and all I had to say was "help" and she was packed and on the plane that afternoon. I have not had a shower or changed out of my pajamas for 3 whole days. I went to the Dr. and we found out that I have gall stones and kidney stones which could be causing my unmanageable pain. The bad thing is, that since I am pregnant there is nothing I can do. He did order me to be on an "absolutely no fat" diet, but since I don't want to eat anyway it shouldn't be that hard. I feel just plain crappy. At least I will have a sweet soft baby at the end of all this. I WILL make it through it, especially since my mom is here for the next week or so to take care of me and my family. Emma is especially grateful that she has someone to play with.
THANK GOODNESS for MOMS!!!!!

Grandma Mary dressed Emma up like a princess and did her hair and makeup so she could go to the ball.

Ready for my prince!

Grandma always lets me help.

The chef hat make the gravy taste better!

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